general · #347
I bought a chair with commitment issues.
Every time I sit down, it folds.
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general · #348
Why was the umbrella promoted?
It covered everyone during a crisis.
Joke link →general · #349
I named my vacuum Closure.
It helps me move on by picking up the pieces.
Joke link →general · #350
Why did the clock refuse dessert?
It was watching its seconds.
Joke link →general · #351
My smoke alarm has a flair for drama.
It gives a standing ovation every time I make toast.
Joke link →general · #352
I bought a boomerang with a warranty.
The return policy is excellent.
Joke link →general · #453
Why did the picture go to jail?
It was framed.
Joke link →general · #454
What did one wall say to the other?
I’ll meet you at the corner.
Joke link →general · #455
Why did the belt get arrested?
It was holding up a pair of pants.
Joke link →general · #456
I bought a ceiling fan.
Complete waste of money. He just stands there shouting, “Go, ceiling!”
Joke link →general · #457
Why did the broom arrive late?
It overswept.
Joke link →general · #458
I’ve started telling people about the benefits of dried grapes.
It’s all about raisin awareness.
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